Why you feel torn (and how to move forward).


Jen Ottovegio Coaching

August 28, 2025

Using "Parts Work" to hear yourself more clearly.

Ever felt like two different voices inside you were pulling in opposite directions?

Here's a tool you can use to ease the friction and find a path forward.


🌀 What is IFS or "Parts Work"?

Simply put, Parts Work (or Internal Family Systems, IFS) is the idea that we’re not just “one self.” We all have different “parts” inside us — inner voices that hold different fears, desires, and perspectives.

One part might want freedom and adventure.
Another part might want safety and stability.
Both are valid. Both want to help. They just have different strategies.


👩‍💼 Client Story: At a Career Crossroads

A client came to me at a career crossroads.

The "Dreamer Part" of her wanted to leave her corporate job, start her own business. To "get off the hamster wheel" as she put it.

The "Safety Part" of her wanted the comfort of a steady paycheck, health benefits, and the safety of staying put.

She kept spinning. Every time she leaned toward freedom, the “safety” part freaked out. Every time she leaned toward staying, the “dreamer” part felt crushed.

In our coaching session, we slowed down and gave both parts space.

  • The dreamer part spoke about excitement, creativity, and living in alignment.
  • The safety part spoke about fear of failure, financial stress, and what her family needed.

When she could see and hear both sides, something shifted.

She realized she didn’t have to pick one and silence the other. She could meet the needs of both parts.

Together, we mapped out a plan that honored both:
→ Keep her corporate job for now, but reduce hours and responsibilities.
→ Begin building her business in a way that felt exciting and safe.

By letting each part be heard, she found an aligned decision — and momentum.


🛠 Try It Yourself: A 3-Step Parts Practice

Next time you feel torn:

  1. Name the parts. “One part of me wants X. Another part of me wants Y.”
  2. Give them space. Imagine asking each part what it needs, what it’s afraid of, what it values.
  3. Look for overlap. Where do they agree? What would feel safe and energizing?

You might be surprised at how quickly clarity emerges when you stop trying to silence one voice and instead listen to both.

This is the kind of work I love doing with clients — bringing the different parts of you together so you can move forward with clarity, integrity, and a plan that feels good in your body.


✨ Reflection

What two parts of you feel most at odds right now?
What might they say if you let them both speak?

Let me know what you think of this tool and what comes up for you as you explore it!


Talk soon,
💙 Jen

P.S. In September, my fall coaching program opens — my lovely newsletter subscribers will get first dibs. Stay tuned!

👉 Know someone who’s feeling stuck? Forward this to them.

600 1st Ave, Ste 330 PMB 92768, Seattle, WA 98104-2246
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Jen Ottovegio

Thriving isn’t a personality trait. It’s a result of *skills* that many of us weren't taught or modeled. I teach those skills through a portfolio of businesses and offerings - group wellness programs in workplaces, 1:1 life coaching, and creative projects. I love helping people feel less anxious and more stoked about their lives. My approach? Professional, practical, and actionable — with a dash of woo and sprinkle of sass.

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